Divas - TNT

Unless you're also a big fan of Piaf, Dietrich and Garland, there's little here to tempt the dedicated balletomane. Peter Schaufuss (a former principal dancer who has performed worldwide) proves himself a disappointingly literal interpreter of thirty of their songs which are blasted through the auditorium. His lacklustre choreography — with its abrupt, repetitive jokey movements — often feels like a knee jerk response to the music.
There are three very prominent chairs on an elevated platform, three ballerinas and three acts. In the first, an exceptionally tall and sinuous ballerina interprets the works of the diminutive Piaf (but, in the absence of a male partner, seems reluctant to be parted from her high-backed chair). In the second, another dancer wafts aimlessly in furs as a redundant but elegant Dietrich (cue lederhosen and goose-stepping from the energetic corps de ballet squashed onto the minimal remaining downstage space). And finally it's the turn of Garland's rather shaky alter ego to try and inject some of 'That Old Black Magic' into this uninspiring show.
There are, intermittently, sensuous and enjoyable moments. But, ironically, it's the pleasure of listening to the recordings of this deceased trio of legendary songstresses (rather than the activity on stage) which gives this so-called dance spectacular life.
Apollo Shaftesbury Avenue, W1 (0870-040 0080). Until 5th July 5. £41-£16